FUDGE

Sometime in 1994 or 1995 I had stumbled upon Shadis Magazine and got a subscription immediately. This was about 5 years after I moved from my hometown and our original AD&D group disbanded forever. I had moved to GURPS, for a time, and was feeling rather isolated in my gaming needs. I was running random games here and there, maybe once or twice a year, and creating gaming junk on my own. Discovering Shadis was like realizing that yes indeed other people do this too!

From the pages of that magazine I must have found out about FUDGE, Steffan O'Sullivan's seminal "freeform universal do-it-yourself gaming experience". And I had to have it. So I sent off an order for a copy. As you can see, I got #94 in a 200 copy limited run, which I assume was the game's first printing/edition (?).

I was mind-melted by the cool-ass Lego-style building blocks that this game represented and I wanted to make something immediately. But I never did. I never even read the entire book. I think it was because I was just so isolated at the time. I didn't have any gamer friends and when I did get to run something or play something it was either AD&D or I used a loosey-goosey system I invented called the ROC RPG (Random Order Creations).

Years later it seems that FUDGE inspired and underpinned Fate. So I should be interested in and excited about maybe trying this game. Yet I'm not. In fact, when a 14-yo kid showed me his copy of Fate and wanted to talk about it I just didn't know what to say. I talked about having FUDGE back in the day and I had listened to a few podcasts about Fate so I knew a little about it. But I couldn't muster the desire to play it, even with this sparkly-eyed kid clearly wanting to play it. I can be a bit of a selfish guy and at that time I wanted to run Barrowmaze using B/X D&D.

Not sure what the point of this is other than to explore this weird memory. I'm always thinking about things I did in the past and why I did them. Or why I didn't. I wish I was more proactive and I wish I worked harder at things. I cringe when I think of all the years I didn't play many games or make much art or create things in general. Holy hell, am I getting old?

I hope that kid is running games now, Fate or otherwise.

Here's my copy. #94... from '94!

Magic and Potential and Teen Me Mind Blown

I remember the first time I realized what RPGs were all about. It was upon reading/browsing (let's be honest here... I was a browser, not a reader) an issue of Dragon Magazine and I have no idea which one. It was during those months when I first became acquainted with D&D at school. The DM of that little game traded me some materials, such as the B/X Expert book and some Dragon issues, for some comics. There was some kind of adventure in the magazine and it was, I think, about an ogre or featured ogres. I do remember that the covers to the issues I had were the fucking awesome chess pics by Denis Beauvais (whose website makes my eyes hurt it's so MySpace-ish).

I had no idea what I was reading. I grokked pretty quickly that it was some kind of setup for adventure. But at this time I hadn't yet got my dirty mitts on the red box, nor even the Expert rulebook alluded to above. I only had Dragon.

First thing I did when I got this shit home was get out a spiral bound notebook and write my first ever adventure. I only wish had that notebook now so I could cringe. It was a house with a few rooms and an ape creature in the attic. It had a floor that would collapse with you. It was on the edge of a ravine in the snow. It was a call to adventure!

At school I recruited a couple of guys and they rolled up characters. One of them was just dead-set on getting high scores. It really bothered him that his character's stats were less than 18. I'll never forget that. It was my first time as DM and I basically caved to his needy mcneeds and he ended up with some ridiculous fighter whose worst ability score was like 16. I have no idea what the other guy played nor do I really remember who he was. Vague, these memories are.

But the point is that I had that moment where you understand, at least broadly speaking, just what an RPG is. It's not a story you read, nor is it a story you tell (although that's how many/most RPG texts kind of framed it). No, an RPG was all about what could be. It was this salad bar of delicious goodies that a DM could cook up and then see what the players decide to put on their plates.

It was lightning in a bottle! Where do you want to go? What do you want to do? Everywhere and anything.

Fantasy Forest: A Long Lost Inspiration

I just noticed that I have 12 drafts in my Blogger sidebar. What could they be??

Here's the first one. I wrote this back in June, I think. Can't figure out why I didn't post it.

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I gotta find this game. I got it for Xmas one year when I was a kid and I think it may have had a bigger impact on my wee brain than I give it credit for. When I try to think about the stuff I like, such as D&D and comics, this game always comes up in my memories.

This would have been the early 80s. I would have been about 11 or so. This was a few years before I discovered D&D. When I encountered D&D the first time it inspired me so much I HAD TO make my own RPG. So before ever holding a single RPG book in my hands I made my own RPG. What did it look like? Fantasy fucking Forest.

I drew a map with a path. I drew monsters on the path, treasure, a castle, etc. At each "encounter", I wrote down two numbers. One was for attack and one was for defense. I then wrote numbers on little pieces of paper and put them into a bowl. I had no dice.

So I ran this game for a couple of cousins who were probably 9-10 years old. It was probably a total clusterfuck but it was my first GMing experience!

I remember making 3 map games in total, using colored pencils and maybe a ball point pen. Unfortunately those items are long, long lost. I would LOVE to find them again. But I don't think they exist anymore.

Phaser-Face

I've got a ton of old small press comics and zines in storage. Haven't looked at them in YEARS. I must have snapped some pics of a few of them a while back and forgot.

This one is Tony Brandl's Phaser-Face and the Infernal Equinox. This was a little series that was full of charm and wonderful cartooning. I was in the United Fanzine Organization with Tony and I had the pleasure of sitting next to him at a S.P.A.C.E.* event around 2002 or 2003. He was a fun guy. At one point he stood on his table and loudly YAWPED. I'm not sure why but it caused more people to visit us. This particular year was not long after 9/11 and Dave Sim was a special guest (he was always a special guest come to think of it... this was probably around the time or before the time he was sort of shown to be a... nutter?).

Sim stood up and made some comment about terrorism, freedom, or something. There was some dude in the room who shouted over him with a counterpoint. It was this weird moment where I got the impression that a real and important political issue was being discussed and I was totally oblivious to it. I was vaguely aware that there were two broad strokes arguments and I didn't understand either of them. I was fairly clueless... I was there for comics, dammit!

Anyhoo... Phaser-Face was great. If I'm not mistaken, Tony left the small press comics scene a year or two later to go to university and became involved in acting. I have no idea where he's at today. First hit I get on Google is his old website, which appears to be fairly empty.

http://www.angelfire.com/art/artoftony/

*Small Press and Alternative Comics Expo, Columbus Ohio.